Every morning I watch my breakfast
as it sizzles in the frying pan.
I eat in solitude,
and I think to myself:
“I am more alive now
than I have ever been.”
It feels elating
to drink my comfortable tea.
Because of this,
I smile at myself
when I brush my teeth
each night.
Going out is such a treat
when
there are no restrictions.
The world is really my oyster,
as it is said,
except it’s like that
but with
menus.
I love the world
and it loves me, I think.
I never would have thought –
years ago –
that really,
genuinely,
food is wonderful.
And
I’m allowed to do all of these things –
I can be over-generous with cooking oil,
make too much pasta,
eat all the pizzas and cakes and intoxicating things
that my heart
desires.
I’m now fully me
and
finally,
I sit with that realisation
with joy by my side.
Ellen Wadsworth is a poet and writer from the East Midlands, but currently lives in London. She is a student at the University of Goldsmiths and plans to continue publishing work alongside studying for her degree. Her work mainly focuses on the impact and aftermath of traumatic events in her life, and she uses poetry as a coping mechanism.
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